Some relationships are hard. Some relationships make lifting your head off of the pillow in the morning too much. The love is there. There’s no doubt about that, but the happiness? The happiness is something that died a long time ago. Eventually you come to admit that to yourself. Eventually you realize that love isn’t enough and that you need to be happy. But, how do you do that? How can you move on and be happy after spending so long with a cloud over you? How do you find happiness and how can you share that happiness with someone else?
It sounds hard, but it isn’t. There are plenty of happy couples out there, who love and support each other through every day living. So, what makes them different? How do they keep a hold of their happiness, when their lives merge together? There’s no real secret. A lot of it is hard work. But, there are certain things, common factors, which set them apart from the rest.
1. Happy Couples Appreciate Each Other.
It sounds too simple to be true, but it’s something, which becomes really easy to forget, when you’ve been with a person for a while. Big things don’t happen that often in life, so we need to appreciate the small things, the every day things that make a person special.
2. Happiest Couples Focus on The Positives.
Life is full of ups and downs. Sometimes you’re going to argue. Sometimes you’re going to stand back to back, as you take on the world. Focusing on the losses won’t do either of you any good though. In fact, the happiest, healthiest couples are those who focus on their strengths and the times that they’ve won. They don’t see arguments as a negative thing, they see them as an opportunity to learn and move forward.
3. Happy Couples Support Each Other.
Life isn’t easy, but having the right people around you can make it a lot easier. Sometimes when you’re in a bad relationship, it’s easy to forget what support actually feels like. You get used to climbing the hill. You get used to every idea causing an argument. This isn’t what happens in a healthy relationship though. Healthy relationships are full of support. When you’re happy in a relationship, you know you can take on the world, because you’re not alone and you have nothing to fear.
4. Happy Couples Build Each Other Up.
It’s natural to be afraid of change. It’s natural to be afraid, when you’re quite sure how something is going to work out. That doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t do it though. Couples of push each other out of their comfort zones, who experience new things and who never let other just settle, are often the happiest of them all.
5. Happy Couples Work on Themselves.
When you’re in a healthy and happy relationship, you’ll find that all of your time isn’t preoccupied with worry and doubt. All of this free time can be used to work on you. It means you can rekindle friendships and build new ones. It means you can enjoy hobbies and find your own happiness that isn’t tied to the relationship, but will boost your relationship all the same.
6. Happy Couples Accept Mistakes.
People are human and they make mistakes. Some mistakes are bigger than others and it’s understandable if you can’t move passed them. It isn’t understandable however to stay with a person and drag out that mistake. If you can’t forgive then you should move on. The happy, healthy couples aren’t those who carry resentments. They are the kind that forgives each other’s mistakes.
7. Happy Couples Put Their Best Foot Forward.
Happy couples aren’t bothered about what other people think about them. They are only concerned with what’s happening in their relationship.
8. Happy Couples Know Their Goals And Work on It Together.
You don’t need to share the same goals, but your goals need to take you to the same places. Happy relationships are built on a mutual future, which you both work on. It doesn’t always matter if you take the same path, but you both need to know that you’re heading to the same place. If he wants children for instance, but you don’t, then this is going to lead to a great deal of unhappiness in the future for one or both of you. To avoid this, happy couples tend to talk about their goals and aspirations, so they both know what the other has planned.
9. Happy Couples Focus on The Real World.
Happy couples don’t spend their entire lives on their phones. They switch off the digital and focus on the real world. They appreciate real moments and tend to only use social media to keep in touch with real life friends and family, rather than using it to update strangers to their every mood and thought.
10. Happy Couples Treat Each Other Well.
Happy couples never forget to treat their other halves, because they recognize how lucky they are. It’s not something that happens every day, but it’s certainly something that happens, even when the card companies aren’t trying to sell the idea.
11. Happy Couples Never Stop Learning and Improving.
People change. Happy couples learn and grow together. They accept that the person they are with today isn’t quite the same person they first met and certainly won’t be the person they are with in ten years, but they know that it doesn’t matter, as long as those changes happen with them around.
12. The Happiest Couples Cheer and Motivate One Another.
Happy relationships are about picking each other up and dusting each other off. If one person is down, then the other should be helping them to cheer up. If one needs support, then the other will be their rock. That’s a fundamental of a strong, healthy relationship.